I’m getting more and more excited for this move to Switzerland.
Tis gonna be great.
If everything works out well enough (which I’m almost certain it will), I might just end up staying there for foeva. I already have a job set up in Germany for next year so we shall see.
:D
I can’t stop thinking about everything, it’s all so weird. I’ve never had anyone close to me be taken away. And maybe we weren’t that close recently, but in the time we spent together, you and me and everyone we were with, I felt like you all were my family and that just makes this a million times harder. I feel like that part of me left when you did. Now I just want you to be here, not even for me, but for everyone else because we all miss you so much.
And also maybe because then I can go on feeling like that part of me still exists. I said it before and I’ll say it again, the time I spent with you was the time in my life that I felt most alive. I thank you for that even though it wasn’t all you, it was everyone in the group. But you were a part of that group and I’ll never forget those weekends.
We jumped in the bushes together and went on late night walks when we were drunk. You gave me your shirt to wear because I was too hot and didn’t have any other clothes to sleep in. I kept it and I still wear it all the time. We jumped in the church fountain and ran away from everyone else, going on private walks and looking at the stars. We danced together in the bathroom with the lights off with six other people and you grabbed me and kissed me. We slept together in your bed that night and laughed about everything in the morning. Even though the next time we hung out, you were with someone else, I didn’t mind. It was my fault actually, I should have stayed with you the entire night instead of going off without you. But no matter what we did together we always had fun. No matter who we were with, no matter if we remembered the next day or not. You filled up my drink and kept me warm. You took care of me, me and everyone else. You made sure everyone was happy and no one got left behind.
I hate that I don’t remember more, and I hate that we won’t be able to make more memories together. Even more than all that, I hate that you were taken so soon. You had so much to offer to the world and you were such a good person. You had a huge heart and I miss you so god damn much and I don’t even know why because we only spent a couple of weekends together, but I do. Those weekends meant a lot to me. You brought me closer to so many people and you made me feel alive.
I don’t know what else to say but RIP, I’ll never forget you.
It’s so weird to think that this time next year, I’ll be living anywhere from Spain to Virginia to Australia. I always say that I don’t like it here but here is home and it’s all I know and I don’t know how I’m going to do this.
